So I just wanted to talk about my morning. I'm sitting here in the coffee shop at Pangani with some of my friends and I am feeling very whole.
I went to breakfast with my amazing roommate who really asked me about my heart and my time here. He's leaving on an amazing journey in a week so I think God set aside this morning for us to hang.
And I know he's going to read this so I can say that our relationship has always felt a little distant. We've been working on it, trying to break down the walls, but this morning I really felt like God was doing something. God has been speaking to me about becoming who he's always made me to be, about being a whole person in his perfect plan. It's hard because for the longest time I've listened to the lies of Satan in telling me I'd always be inadequate and a failure so I started to believe it. When I look around this room I see people who've graduated from college, had careers, and in my eyes lived a better life than me so I feel like I am somehow less than them at times. The reality is that they've all left that in the same way I left a progressive church plant where I could have launched some form of formal church career to come here and find ourselves in God. We are all here to find Gods purpose for our lives and to learn to love each other in the good times and the bad times.
It's these moments I need to hold on to as small victories and cherish them in my heart so when things get rough I can go back and remember that I do have love for the people here, even if it isn't full yet. I can remember that through our journeys we can uplift and encourage, even when that is the last thing I want to do.
Friday, March 14, 2008
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2 comments:
Chris, Trust God. He knows what you need and when to apportion it to you.
You are "enough" and much loved by your friends here in beautiful Hernando county....
Keep posting and keep on believing....
Edna
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